A friend of mine often asks me to look for "a way forward which is nutritive" to me. A way to tell if something feels "nutritive" is if, when you envision it, it feels good in your body -- your body lets you know, even when your mind won't (or can't).
This is different than my typical black and white thinking that anything helpful to others depletes me, and anything nutritive to me depletes someone else.
There are ways forward which can be helpful to others and nutritive to me. It just takes a little work to find them, and more than work, it takes trust -- learning to trust our intuition, what we hear deep in our center.